August 22, 2011

If one falls down his
friend can help him up, but pity the man who falls and
has no one to help him up!

Eccl. 4:10

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August 22, 2011

I love the fact that God placed in each of us a void that needs to be filled. One part of the void can and should only be filled by God. The other void is for companionship here on earth. All of us have this desire
to be liked by someone and be a friend. That is why social networks like Facebook and MySpace are so popular. The only problem with those networks is that the very reason we keep getting on them is because they can’t fill the void. The only way the lonely void can truly be satisfied is through real relationships.
Now when I say real, I mean you go out with this friend, they know your family and you know theirs.

There are some of us that have many friendships, but all of them are a bit different from the others. My children are now at that wonderful age when I can consider them my friends. My daughters are my greatest friends and for so many reasons. Let’s just say they are truly loving, godly women who are a joy to be around. I have 2 sisters who are my friends. The three of us know that we have one another’s back. Next in line come my friends–two of them are from high school and the rest I collected along the years. All of them are a treasure and I thank God for them.

Who out of all of them do I consider my best friend? None of them and that is because my husband is my best friend.

Now this is a concept that is difficult for some people to understand. Some people think that relationship or years known is what constitutes a best friend status. They are wrong. You can know someone your entire life, be as close as twins and still not be best friends. You can be  friends with someone a very long tie, almost all of your lifetime and still not be best friends. What makes this statement so true? Well, for those of you whose spouse is your best friend you understand this: There are secrets that are shared, a vulnerability that is exposed, and your spouse is the only one who is privy to all of that. That is a good thing and this is what God truly intends when He tells you to forsake all others.

When you marry you forsake all others but that does not mean you abandon all others. Gary and I go out of our way to make sure that doesn’t happen. With that said, we go out of our way to make sure no one comes between us. We understand that when God tells us to forsake all others, He does mean not to put any person before the one you married. I know my children read this devotional and I know they understand that there is a closeness they share with their spouses that I am not allowed to comment on or come between. There is a mutual respect that must be carefully guarded and it is.

Now the benefit of having a close friend like a spouse is because if one of you falls down, the other is there to pick you up. Gary was a single man for over 15 years when I met him. He slept alone and upstairs while
his handicapped child slept on the main floor. If Gary had his heart attack just 2 years earlier he would have died. The fact that he had someone in the bed next to him is all of God’s doing. I was there and because I was there, God was able to wake me up and spring me into action. Gary is alive today and the two of us thank God for that. Gary fell down and I was able to help him up.

Today if you are reading this and you are one of those couples who sleep in separate bedrooms, may what I write encourage you to climb back into the same bed. Determine today that you will be there for them should they fall down. This is the greatest part of being married and a lot of couples miss out on it because they want their own space. Don’t do that. Instead learn to be there for each other and love one another enough to be each other’s best friend.

We have lots of friends. Some can be very close, some can be related. None of them will ever be as close to you as your spouse. This is the only person who shows you who they really are and you show them the real you. Do what you can to remain close and do what you must to forsake others.

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